Who cares?

I've been observing that we're caring less and less about each other. Some people don't care about themselves and that might be fine, you and your family and your goldfish can deal with that, but when you stop caring about others, it affects everyone around you. Everyone around you makes up the society. Not caring eventually affects everyone.

A lot of our problems stem from disregard for others in our words, actions and decisions. We are all something to someone, parents, children, managers, drivers, politicians, service providers, significant others, teachers, doctors, lawyers. When we all stop collectively caring, we breed a society that then adapts to thriving on carelessness for its survival.

Politicians do not care about the future of our natural resources when they squander billions in revenue on non-income earning skylines while people in certain parts of the country still have to tote water daily, through muddy tracks...

Politicians do not care about us when they make grandeur promises knowing fully well that their only intent is to secure votes over and beyond securing the quality improvement in the lives of their voters...

Politicians do not care about us when daily we cry out about injustices in our society, or maybe they do care, but they'll act after bowing down and brown-nosing in preparation for the Summit of the Americas. That wall being built to cloak the Beetham while 200 leased SUVs zoom by takes takes a lot of time and effort, especially with our outstanding cadre of Gov't project managers...

We don't care about the pregnant mother, with two children strapped in the back seat listening to Mickey Mouse's "Ride-along-a-ding-dong" when we decide it's okay to break a red light, even if the filament turned from amber to red about five seconds ago...

We don't care about anyone else on the road when we drive at ridiculous speeds, switch lanes without signaling, squeeze into lanes, the shoulder being christened a 4th one...while cussing poeple who have legitimate emergencies and are using it for its intended purpose...

We don't care about paying our employees increased minimum wages, maybe it's because it'll crowd our abilities to purchase keyless entry, push-start button TT$1.3 million dollar vehicles, matching ones for the wifey too...

We don't care about each other when we have repeated unsafe encounters, only to one day realize that our "infectiousness" went a step or two beyond mere character...

We don't care where after robbing and terrorizing a family, we take off our masks to ensure that everyone sees our faces, so that murdering all ah allyuh has some rationality behind its justification...

We don't care about the women who we harass, objectify, dehumanize and shout disgusting "compliments" to, until we find out our girlfriends, sisters, mothers, daughters fell victim to same, then of course, we want to find who "disrespeck meh gyul so"

We didn't care when we voted PNM again...

We didn't care when we voted UNC again...

We didn't care when we voted COP never...

We don't care about crime or we would have the Gov't and Police answering to a lot more than tea and cofee press conferences while accepting Standard 4 Common Entrance Essay Prep Class reasoning for the mess we've created...

We don't care when we continue to find ways and means of procuring the plasters to the wounds of our society instead of dealing with the weapons and weapon masters that inflict them...

Maybe I don't care, because maybe all I'm going to do is rant and rave and misbehave and then decide which fete I'm going to this weekend...

Happy 2009 T&T (feel the sarcasm, feel it!)

How fitting that my first blog of 2009 has to be a rant and rave about the "paradise" I live in? If the cyap fit, let the nation of T&T wear it...

Coming home from a party, I am at a red light, said light turneth green, I wait my usual 2 seconds to accommodate the light-breaking donkeys' rectums who usually break the opposing red...

I proceed most devoutly from said light only to bounce up a fluorescent green automobile breaking the light 5 seconds after it's red, 3 secs computer controlled to deter accidents and 2 secs human controlled by yours truly because of aforementioned donkeys' rectums...

Next thing I had to engage 4 wheel disc sports brakes of my Honda SiR (Sport Induction Racing - just to emphasize the degree of brakes ah mash) because said fluorescent green automobile manned and manoeuvred by said donkey's rectum decides to break the red light, well beyond 5 seconds, even 10 secs, since technically one is supposed to slow down and stop upon approaching an amber...

To my surprise everyone in the fluorescent green automobile turns out to be donkeys' rectums, a collective herd if you will, as they watch me as if I madddddddddddddd, as if is me, as if is I break de light...

So I watch them back...then they "sped" off in their cocoon of donkey rectumicity...

Sensitized to Trinidadian driving, and thinking all in a day's (or night's) life of usage of roads in the Republic...I calmly fled the scene of the crime...(yes it is a criminal offence, indictable under the laws of the constitution that govern this said state to break a red light)

Next thing Police coming up behind me, blaring siren, gyalanvting and ting, so I say, "Aye Aye! Manning musbe coming home from party or maybe one of he stitches burst...", So being a law abiding citizen, I indicate and pull aside.

Next ting police stop by me...right next to the driver side door, dangerously close, I could see the white in his eyes, then he starts to yell and gesticulate like a market fish vendor about to sell a king fish (by the pound)...

Inspector Donkey Rectum: How long yuh supposed to wait by a green light before moving off?
Me: ......................um....................
Inspector Donkey Rectum: TWO Seconds!!!
Me:.......................buh....um...wha.... (looking like a common entrance student during final jeopardy)
Inspector Donkey Rectum: But noooooooooooooo! Yuh cyah wait! Then yuh go wait whole day for de wreckor to come and move yuh cyar!

At this point in time all I could think was...

TRINIDAD...WE ARE WHERE WE ARE...BECAUSE WE ARE WHERE WE CHOOSE TO BE...

HAPPY 2009 TRINI...

When we don't deal with the problems, when those in charge with upholding the law don't chase down fluorescent green automobiles to question why they broke a red light and possibly apprehend said light breaker, but instead choose to chase me down to ask me why I didn't wait a bit longer to obey the law, why I didn't if you will, over-obey the law...

As granny used to say...

We reach where we going...only thing is we reach here long time and now we just sitting down drinking bitter mauby whilst it all unfolds around us...

HAPPY 2009 Trini...

"Inspired" by Chris

If Chris were with us to experience his own unfair as it was untimely death, what would've been his reaction? And it's this question that I think best answers who he was and the invaluable lesson he taught us on how we should exist.

The notion of Chris being around for this experience first hit me during his funeral, when his best friend made a request (probably more so on Chris's behalf, him knowing Chris all to well and better than most), that we not be sad, that we live, love and laugh, the way he would want us to. 

It then hit me again when after his funeral, we were all eating and the place was quiet and someone said, "Could you imagine if Chris were here? He would have us rolling, this place would be in an uproar!" As security changed shift, I remember the relieving guard uneasily exclaiming, "How this place busy so?" and I smiled and thought to myself, "You real lucky Chris not here..."

I could see Chris looking down on us and saying in that deep, unmistakable voice, "Aye! Wha happen to allyuh? Come nah man!" Then hit you that infectious smile and say, "Doh worry! Everything go be irie! Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyye!"

Chris, this is how we honour your memory. This is how your existence, your life continues within us all...

This is how we take your 24 years of joy and success and transform them into life-long lessons for us all. This is how your death does not just become another statistic, another sign of the times, another reason to be outraged about the world we live in, another reason to add someone or something to our revenge/avenge list, another reason to blame the Government, another reason to focus on the negative.

This is how your death becomes something positive. This is how we can never ever allow your death to be in vain. This is how your memory can help us become more positive, more jovial and less concerned with the negative.

This is how you remind us that successful endings transcend humble beginnings. That humility, as it was in the beginning should always be held constant, right to the very end.

This is how your memory is going to help me rally the troops at the next event/lime so much so that the life of the party starts with me, but ends with we, that we eh come here to stand up and be jess so.

This is how your memory is going to help us make scary steps in life, like leaving the comfort of  something for a chance with the unknown.

This is how your memory is going to help us mash up Trini Posse stand in the oval for the next West Indies game, while everyone around us first offer looks of confusion, but one hour after jumping up and singing louder than we, and that is when we losing, if we winning, Lord have mercy!!!

This is how you showed us how easy it is to reach out and befriend people, whether it be front and centre stage in a Carnival fete, on a training course, in the oval, office, wherever. 

This is how you showed us that laughter is still very infectious, especially in a world where everything around us seems bent on finding a cure for it.

This is how your memory is going to help us transform the death of friend into the re-birth of our outlook on life...

This is how we live, laugh, love, work, play, lime, listen, care, succeed...the way you showed us how and the way, looking down from above, you would want us to...

Thank you Chris! 

Part 2 of 2

In a "State" of Emergency

Inspired by Chris...

My state of mind is one of emergency as I cogitate on this state (T&T) of emergency in which I live and I demand a state of emergency. What's ironic is that these three states of "being", have transcended and have "become"; even more emergent after the gunning down of a friend and coworker. 

People talk about crime hitting home. Hitting home? Crime is now a tenant, one which refuses to pay rent and eviction notices are scoffed at. Crime tells me, "Good morning sir..." first thing in the morning over a newspaper perusal and a cup of tea. Crime sits in my passenger seat on my journey to work as I stop at a traffic light and strange men approach my car, if only because jay-walking is fashionable. Crime strolls beside me, like a second, bigger, darker shadow on my way to the office and reminds me that my car may not be there on my return. Crime sits by my desk all day and reminds me that all I work hard for could one day be snuffed out because crime doh pay, so I might one day have to settle his bill, tip included. Crime reminds me that I'm thankful that none of those children skipping down the street after school are my own, because he's very interested in meeting them someday. Crime leaves the office with me, reminding me that dem nice clothes and shoes you have there and that laptop in yuh hand, making yuh look like a real good ticket for that Beenie Man concert next week. Crime often drives home with me, less than a car length behind, making me ready with anti-kidnapping manouvres, but then flicks an indicator and turns left into Winter Gardens, one street before mine. Crime lies in bed with me as I pray that thank God, today, we did not meet, but ever reminding that he may be a missed prayer away from us meeting tomorrow. "Good night sir..."

End of pt. 1

MY Country

Ownership of something or someone is conveniently transferred and becomes YOURS when there is a problem with it. In every situation before it was OURS but when the feces hits the spinning blades of the ceiling fan that doubles as a light suspended from your wood stained roof, it becomes YOURS. Exhibit A, my mother to my father the other day, "YOUR son is liming too much, YOUR son is never home!" to which I replied, "MY father will stand up for me!" to which my father replied, "YOUR ass is on YOUR own!" Capiche?

So when I got a call from friend asking what is going on in YOUR country...take some deep breaths, its gonna be a lengthy dive and unbeknownst to you, the tank is heavy regardless of the lack of Oxygen...

CRIME STOPPERS, that statistically acclaimed bastion of crime stopperism is offering rewards for "handing in of guns", limerick and all, gracing our national airwaves, while stuck in traffic, making you wish that you yourself had a gun to hand in, so you could actually shoot your car deck...if only a civic dashboard were easier to find.

So what those in authority who suffer from continuous daily mental decay don't realize is that as a gangster who is well versed in the art of gangsterism (which I practiced daily since my daddy left me at 3 yrs. old and I had to fend for myself because mummy had no time for me after the new man she picked up a few months later and she had another baby) and who is smarter than most of them can hope (with prayer and a national day of fasting) to ever become don't clock is this...

Wheys, rewards for guns? Well I have about 4 and ah rent Tommy one de odder day to put dong ah wuk and he eh bring it back fuh me yet, but he spend de weekend in de station, so maybe ah go get that later, and plus this one gettin li'l ol', 'cause de other day when ah was about to buss ah serious cyap in ah man ass cause he refuse to give up de Jordans, doh mind dat negro doh play basketball no more, ah find it didn't quite fire as it used to when de policeman did now sell meh it, yeah dread, ah hit de man in he shoulder and he survive, ah lose some rank wid de boys, but small ting.

Plus ah wha take dat reward money and geh ah lil something newer and shinier. Ah hear it have gun sale dong on de east coast this month end too, yeah, ah nice shipment comin in from Mexico, foreign use from Iraq nuh, de war on terror doh stop dey, is de war dat keeps on giving, so ah could probably try fuh dat in serious.

Cause at de end of de day when dat nozzle in your face and yuh cringe up in fear like ah manicou in de torchlight, ah want yuh tuh see yuh reflection in de tip ah de barrel, so when de light at de end of de tunnel becomes de explosive spark at de end of my barrel and your world and mine become one and the same, one of darkness and no tomorrow, yuh go remember it when yuh drop to de ground, and ah take off de chain yuh refuse to give meh, that ah later find out gold plated and yuh get at Opnet anyway, ha-ha-ha-ha you and me eh so different after all, and as yuh start to enjoy the cooling pillow of yuh own blood for your eternal slumber and yuh ready to meet yuh maker that I doh believe in, yuh go wish yuh had call CRIME STOPPERS, cause I is Frank, yuh neighbour who yuh did know wuk nowhere but have everything nicer than you and yuh did never see Courts come and take back anyting dat was on hire purchase, yuh go tink bout dat as yuh see meh tief Jordans disappearing down de road, lacings untied and all...

Deal with the firetrucking issues T&T.

Nuff said!

John Walker & Sons fear 1Q08 Crisis

AP, John Walker & Sons of Kilmarnock, Scotland has today signalled to the market a significant reduction in 2008 1st Quarter Profits. As it's stakeholders ingested the slightly bitter news, the burning sensation was felt by many, specifically, shareholders who experienced severe decreases in stock price brought on by declinging market expectations.

The world famous producers of blended scotch whiskey made this announcement in lieu of expected falling demand over the next 40 days. When questioned as to why this exact time period, Mr. Alexander Walker smugly answered, justifiably and to some degree obviously so, in one word, "Lent".

He continued, "As millions of deluxe scotch whisky drinkers worldwide forego the vice that is our product in the name of religious sacrifice, we anticipate a marked decrease in sales demand. However, we are relying on heathenous customers, oh we love them so, to continue taking nips and sips in the wee hours of the morning, whilst their wives sleep of course. This and increased and improved marketing campaigns in non-Christian markets will ensure the continued success of this household brand name. Also, as always, we can always rely on black market sales. Though, I emphatically state that we do not condone the black market. Did someone get that on tape?"

He concluded by stating that 2Q sales are anticipated to be record breaking as loyal customers are expected to make up for "lost consumption time" experienced over the Lenten period.

In other news, Fernandes Breweries Ltd.'s Chairman laughed, moreso scoffed at the notion of falling rum sales during the Lenten season. He simply and condescendingly replied that, "Rum is yuh lover, rum is yuh friend, you drink it today, you drink it forever, ahkayla, have no fearrrrrrrrrr, yuh wha yuh rum in de morning, yuh wha yuh rum in de evening, yuh could bring it in ah bottle, yuh could bring it in ah chalice..."

Indicators/Turn Signals Optional

Soon to be seen as an option on all new cars in Trinidad and Tobago...

Leather Seats - Yes/No
Side and Curtain Airbags - Yes/No
Indicators/Turn Signals - Yes/No
5 Disc In dash CD Player - Yes/No
Chilled Glove Compartment - Yes/No

Thought process behind option 3? We don't use the blasted things anyway, so give people the choice of not opting for something they're never gonna use.

Now that's customer service! The customer is always right, even if he never plans to signal to the driver behind that he is...

The origin of Wining

This is going to be contentious, but contentiousness is why we now know today that the world is not flat...

We begin with a fable...

Circa the beginning of Carnival in Trinidad and Tobago, a french man, one Jean-Claude De Bouboulaise observed the "natives" moving their pelvic regions, that being hips, buttocks and even on the periphery, their thighs, in a manner that was similar to that of winding up something. He then wondered, "Why are these people winding up their bodies like that?".

Ergo, winding or as we say, due to complications arising out of our dialect, dropping the "d" sound, as in, "Why yuh minin meh business?"; wining was born.

My reason for this blog?

I'll give you several

Whining
Winning
Wineing

It's win'ing, more fittingly wining.

As I wind up this blog, I ask myself, "Why is this my first blog of 2008? Shouldn't I have written some restropective and forward thinking 2008 year of great things monologue?"

I guess it really is wining season...